Tuesday, April 20, 2021
Ann Birner
Patience
All I could see of the email on my phone’s tiny screen was that it was from Rob - a request to contribute a Daily Reflection. Panic struck! While I would hate to say no, could I meet the high bar set by previous writers? I have enjoyed and benefited from each reflection. I have admired the skillful writing displayed, as well as the deep thinking and intimate knowledge of the Bible. Any contribution I might make would surely pale in comparison.
But wait – the topic is patience? So perfect for me! I have struggled with patience, or the lack thereof, for years. What a blessing to be prompted to ponder it further in order to share my personal experience and thoughts.
“________ is a virtue.” Which virtue first comes to mind? I am guessing patience for most people. It certainly does for me. Yet I did not think much about patience until I was in my fifties and both of my parents developed dementia at around the same time. It was a struggle, particularly after my father asked me to take on his affairs. My older siblings often criticized my subsequent decisions and actions. One afternoon, following a 400+ mile drive, I pushed Dad’s wheelchair around in circles in the tiny yard outside of the skilled nursing facility where he was recovering from an acute medical event. For several hours we visited, often covering the same topic repeatedly. We sang and we prayed, also with much repetition. It suddenly occurred to me that I was being patient. I asked myself, where did this patience come from? Why couldn’t I have found this wellspring of patience when my two sons were small? And why couldn’t I be more patient with my dear husband, especially as he was such a rock during this difficult time? I remembered the many times when I had been impatient with the people I love best, and was filled with regret.
Raised in the Roman Catholic faith, with twelve years of Catholic education including daily Mass from grades one through eight, I knew my catechism, the gospels, and the kid-friendly stories of the Old Testament. I have never, however, considered myself a student of the Bible. There is very little I can quote “chapter and verse”. But shortly after this experience with my dad, I heard a reading from Colossians at the Lutheran church I was attending at the time, and it stuck with me. It immediately became a part of my daily prayers and has helped me immensely. Often when I feel a bout of impatience coming on, it springs to mind unbidden. I offer my prayer to you, along with my story, with gratitude for these precious words and the opportunity to revisit them. Adapted from Colossians 3:12-14, the wording has been adjusted and emphasis added so that it represents what I hear in my head when I say this prayer.
" Heavenly Father, help me to put on my compassionate heart, and to clothe myself with patience, kindness, humility, and meekness. And above all these please help me to clothe myself with love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.”