What is Rite 13?

Rite 13 is a ceremony that celebrates and honors a child's rite of passage into adolescence. So many of our Christian rituals (Baptism, weddings, funerals, confirmation, etc.) mark major life transitions. Rite 13 offers a way to mark the transition to adolescence while saving the rite of confirmation for high schoolers who have had more time to grapple with what they believe. Rite 13 is a complement to Confirmation, not a replacement. It signifies a transition in the relationships between young folks and their community, parents, family and friends. It celebrates the fact that God’s love extends to those difficult years. Even Jesus was a teenager at some point!

Rite 13 gives all of us a way to come together in support of our youth as they negotiate the joyous, exciting, turbulent waters of adolescence. It’s a beautiful and reflective time for families to unite around an important transition, for teens to bond with one another, and for parents to celebrate AND commiserate!

Your teen won’t be alone in going through this ceremony and there’s still time for more folks to sign up. Rite 13 is another way that we hope to build community among the youth of St. John’s.

Rob is available to answer any questions you have. You can e-mail us, call us at St. John's (603.436.8283), or reach us on our cell phones (listed below).

Meeting Dates:

Rob Stevens will host the teens at his house in Portsmouth several times leading up to the week of the ceremony. You will hear from him about scheduling these gatherings.

Monday, May 16th — By 3PM — All letters and pictures for Rite 13 participants are due.
Wednesday May 18th — 5-7PM — Final gathering for the teens as a group to begin to prepare for the weekend. Teens bring their letter to themselves to this meeting.
Saturday May 21st 6PM-8PM — Family Dinner and rehearsal of Rite 13 Ceremony for both teens and parents. This is a chance for parents to spend an evening with their teen, to celebrate them, and to be in community with other families. We’re specifically asking that parents come with their teen, and not with any of the teen’s siblings. The evening works better if each parent can be focused on their teen going through the ceremony. E-mail us if you have any dietary restrictions/allergies/concerns.
Sunday, May 22nd — Rite 13 Ceremony during the 10:00 am Service. Please arrive around 9:30 so we can make sure to have all families gathered and seated towards the front.

Letters:

One of the major components of Rite 13, and probably the most impactful, is the collection of letters we’ll hand to each teen.

Each family is asked to write and solicit letters for their child. These are essentially love letters, or letters of admiration, to your teen. I encourage you to solicit them from far and wide if you'd like: Teachers, coaches, grandparents, aunt/uncles, older siblings, cousins, mentors, friends, etc...They’re all great choices! Some guiding prompts for the letters might be:

• What do you wish for this young person as they grow toward adulthood?

• What kind of adult do you see them growing into?

• What makes this young person special? Unique?

• What do you value or cherish about your teen?

• What are their special gifts and talents?

• How are you proud of them?

• What have you learned from them? What have they taught you?

• What advice do you have from your own experience growing up? What do you wish you had known that you know now?

• Why do you love him or her?

There are NO rules to the letters and definitely no wrong answers. Write from your heart….

We’re asking parents to collect these for their teen, and then deliver them as a collection to Tebbetts House (the St. John’s office). With help we’ll compile the letters into a book that will be shared with your child at the rehearsal dinner on Saturday, May 21st.

Letters can be written on any kind of paper, but please note they will be glued into a scrapbook, so they need to be one sided. Multiple pages are fine — the only restriction is that they be one sided.

Drawings, poems, collages are also encouraged — but please remember the intention is that these will be glued into a scrapbook, so make sure they are not too big or heavy.

If you’re thinking “Wow, this sounds like so much. I don’t even know where to begin,” I’m happy to provide you with a form letter to invite others to participate. You just plug in the e-mail address of anyone you think would be willing to write letters, and your work is done (until you get the letters back and hand them off to us).

Letters must be delivered to us at the Tebbetts House (St. John's office) no later than Monday, May 16th by 3PM.

Youth letter:

Each teen will write a letter to their selves. They do not have to share these but will please bring them to our meeting on May 18th — we are grateful for your help communicating this assignment to your child. I’ve attached these directions as a separate sheet for you to print out and hand to your teen.

Pictures:

For the rehearsal dinner, we’ll put together a slideshow of photos of all the participants. We ask that you send 10-15 photos of your child that show them growing up as well as highlight who they are as a unique individual. Please send these to us by Monday, May 16th by 3PM, by Dropbox, Google Photos, CD, thumb drive, or any other mode that keeps them all together and at a relatively high quality (10-15 photos probably won’t fit as an e-mail attachment).

Thank you for your patience with all this information, and for your willingness to support your child through this.

With gratitude,

Ashley, Rob, and Olin

The Rev. Rob Stevens

Email: rector@stjohnsnh.org

Cell: 603-828-1962

Ashley Wade

Email: ashley@stjohnsnh.org

Cell: 508-776-8951

Olin Johannessen

Email: olin@stjohnsnh.org

Cell: 413-687-3774