Tuesday, February 23, 2021
Tuesday in the First Week of Lent
Joe Porter
The Collect of the Day
Grant to your people, Lord, grace to withstand the temptations of the world, the flesh, and the devil, and with pure hearts and minds to follow you, the only true God; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.
Readings: Isaiah 55:6–11, Matthew 6:7–15 & Psalm 34:15–22
Greetings.
Since we’ve probably not met, I’d like to introduce myself and tell you why I’m writing today’s reflection. My name is Joe Porter, and my husband, Carter Elliott, and I were married at St. John’s in September 2011. I think we were the first same gender couple married at St. John’s. At the time, we were living in Atlanta, GA, and now live in Jacksonville, FL. In 2011, New Hampshire and the Diocese of New Hampshire were among the very few states and Episcopal dioceses where same gender marriage was possible. We sought out St. John’s because of a long-ago family connection.
To me, Lent is a time of spiritual renewal and transformation. When Rob asked me to contribute a daily reflection during Lent, I was excited and felt blessed with the opportunity to participate in the life of a parish that’s dear to me (and Carter). Rob gave me Isaiah 55:6-11, Matthew 6:7-15 and Psalm 34:15-22 as the readings. I was immediately drawn to Matthew 6: 7-15, and to 6:11 in particular: “give us this day, our daily bread.” This passage spoke to me of the spiritual renewal, our daily bread, that I found at St. John’s.
Having been together for 17 years at that time, Carter and I wanted to get married. I’ve always thought of marriage as one of the sacraments – and one that, in 2011, laws and most Episcopal dioceses denied us.
But we were offered what we hungered for at St. John’s. From our initial call with Wendy Cote to our service with Rob several months later, we found love, joy and excitement. As I write this reflection and remember our service, I have tears welling up in my eyes, and I re-experience the renewal I found during the service.
When Rob said the blessing, this amazing image came to me, one I can best describe using an analogy. A couple’s relationship is similar to a house they build for themselves. I realized that our house had so many more beautiful rooms than I’d ever known were there. I was reminded that “in my father’s house, there are many rooms.” I felt spiritually fed. Our relationship became a marriage, and we were at home.
When I think of Lent, I think of spiritual renewal and transformation. I had one of my most powerful experiences of spiritual renewal and transformation that day at St. John’s. Thank you.
Carter and I have returned to Portsmouth every September for a week or two (except for 2020/COVID) to visit St. John’s, have lunch with Rob, and enjoy the area. I hope we have the opportunity to meet each other.